Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

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Saturday, October 04, 2008

Posted 10:20 AM by Gene

An argument for Yahoo! going bust: Today on its home page it leads off with a press release about some former radio personality getting married. It leads off because its commercial calculus assumes we its turnips would be interested, and media behemoths like Yahoo! love to talk down to us. Indeed we've decided that Yahoo! now runs as many press releases as USAOKAY!!!!!, which in Sunnyvale they'd think is a compliment. (That Yahoo! hasn't started an Investigative Unit that would prove Boobs's adultery and The Messiah's innocence from Bill Ayers is beyond us.) We would note, however, that YHOO last split in 2004, and unless some extraplanetary financier comes into the picture it is highly unlikely it will ever split again, except perhaps in reverse.

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