THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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1. While we're pleased that The American Society of Willfully Ignorant Advertisers has finally gotten the news that people may not be watching as much network brain rot as they used to, this story cuts both ways -- for, let's face it, declining ad spending does reflect a declining economy. On the other hand, declining network ad spending may also reflect that that The American Society of Willfully Ignorant Advertisers has finally gotten the news about network TV.
2. And the boob screen's most devoted followers are getting a message too: TV, whatever the ad-blurbists say, may not be getting better.
3. P&G takes over Seligism!
Who needs it?
4. Even supermarket retailer Kroger Co. saw same-store sales grow 5% in August. Kroger Chairman-CEO David Dillon said on a Sept. 16 conference call that Kroger's year-over-year product-cost inflation was 4.9%, accounting for almost all that gain.
TRANSLATION: It pays to overcharge!