Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

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Saturday, January 10, 2009

Posted 5:32 PM by Gene

SLIME's rags always fall for every last stunt because your subservient hack wants to be helpful. Flying cars will not happen in our lifetimes, for obvious reasons, like -- if people can't drive on the road...not to mention drunk air-driving, mid-air collisions that could kill people on the ground, morons doing "wheelies" and other idiot stunts, and the impossibility of traffic control (where would you put road signs and traffic lights?); the idea that internal navigation systems would help is sheer fantasy -- just like air-driving. And we haven't mentioned their energy inefficiency -- a god's gift to our enemies the Saudis and the Russians. Which reminds us -- a squadron of these could be useful in terror attacks. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO thank you, SLIME.

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