Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Saturday, March 28, 2009

Posted 1:32 PM by Gene

As we all know by now, the WORRRRULLLLLLD COMMUNITY is very good at symbolism. "Arresting" the president of Sudan was very good symbolism. Now said community is engaging in what will no doubt become an annual WORRRRULLLLLLD HOLIDAY by turning out the lights on its most prominent edifices. Or as ASSPress typist Kristen puts it in the nineteenth of her twenty-one grafs:

Earth Hour organizers say there's no uniform way to measure how much energy is saved worldwide.

Or, for that matter, how much energy is wasted by powering down and powering up.

Of course the League of Nations would very keenly exaggerate any claims of energy saving. Unfortunately this story appeared in FOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!NEWS.com and is therefore not credible FOR THAT REASON ONLY. Meantime the world's hacks continue in their long, deep, blissful sleep.

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