THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
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Comic Sans MS (I hadn't known its name until now) is a dorky looking font, but really no better or worse than other dorky looking fonts. That it's inspired by "The Dark Knight Returns and Watchmen" is unsurprising as computer geekery is but an extension of comic-book geekery. What doesn't surprise us either is that one of the universe's leading "news" organizations led us to this Wall Street Journals dissertation on it, SLIME's LIBERAL EDITION henchmen finding themselves an A1-printed 1,300-word excuse late last week to do one less article about you-know-who (as opposed to His CONSERVATIVE EDITION, obsessive and obstreperous in its own way). Yes, I know, the Journals have a tradition of running these keeyute stories and like that, but lately all we've been getting from news hacks is keeyute stories -- for a public-be-damned reason.