Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Thursday, June 11, 2009

    Posted 5:20 PM by Gene

    We have often said how news hacks stumble and fall onto the truth, and if one of the Ranceoids doesn't execute a pratfall to end all pratfalls:

    Mr. Weinstock cautioned against being overt or ham-handed in the delivery of R-rated marketing content online.

    But isn't overt ham-handedness the point of these masterpieces? Isn't the point of the red-bands to sell to as many minors as possible?



    A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD TO CLAUDE, WHO'S LOOKING FOR A JOB WITH VERY LITTLER JEFFY!

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