Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Tuesday, March 16, 2010

    Posted 5:58 PM by Gene

    Today I mailed out my Census form. Some con-SER-va-tives have decided to protest the RACE question by identifying themselves as "American". This is a stupid gesture. Only clerks will see it and they'll roll their eyes. I don't like our government making race such a sticking point but it already knows too much (and not enough) about us; what's an irrelevant factoid like this?

    One could make a case for privatizing the Census; but if a con-SER-va-tive wished to make an ASS of himself he'd propose Nielsen -- which should do as good a job guessing the population as it does guessing TV audiences from samples of thousands.

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