THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
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MY SO-CALLED LIFE! SEINFELD!! THE SOPRANOS!!! BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER!!!! SURVIVOR!!!!! I’LL FLY AWAY!!!!!! CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION!!!!!!! THE X-FILES!!!!!!!! NORTHERN EXPOSURE!!!!!!!!! ROSEANNE!!!!!!!!!! GILMORE GIRLS!!!!!!!!!!! NYPD BLUE!!!!!!!!!!!! FRASIER!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALLY MCBEAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND, IN THE MUCH-TOO-OVERLOOKED CATEGORY, AMERICAN DREAMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE RICHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE FLYING CONCHORDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND IT’S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TV HAS GIVEN US WONDROUS FARE OVER THE LAST 20 YEARS, AND PHILADELPHIA INQUIRER TV CRITIC JONATHAN STORM HAS BEEN PAID TO WATCH IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [Wondrous overemphasis added]
Alas it appears Jonny will still be paid to watch it, but he reminds us of one reason the VeryStinkyInky should have folded. News hacks love to drumbeat it into our dear little ears that they give us what we need. Too often however they give us what they think they deserve -- triumphal backscratching, epochal logrolling, immortal toadying, and the subsequent emblazoning of their names on the wall of glory. Never mind they can't strike a wet match with their prose. How fitting that I found this breathless (and most likely self-) congratulation amidst this ad, which should prove the VeryStinkyInky isn't worth the blogs it's printed on.