Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Friday, June 11, 2010

Posted 10:10 PM by Gene

We note that the CRYONIC MAYOR, fresh from two months in luxury boxes at the United Center, all but rushed with superhuman speed to the mike to proclaim His turnips won't have to pay a dime for today's coronation of the Blackhawks. As well he should. For every fan going into a Blutonian frenzy are three people who resent they have to pay to make good for mobs, and it behooves corporate America to sweep up their elephantine leavings -- although God knows how many tax breaks they'll take, or whether they've been outside of a luxury box in ages themselves.

In fairness, though, it appears the Chicago fans were well behaved, and we salute them for their good nature.

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