Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Monday, August 30, 2010

Posted 6:52 PM by Gene

There seems to be a cycle with SNL: Every four years the hacks proclaim it's never been so unfunny, and then PRESTO! Two years later Belushi and Aykroyd are back. (As if THEY were funny.) All this cycling and recycling says is that with LOTS of news-hack help SNL will STILL be on the air in 36 years, which makes us ponder how many more unfunny comedians and grossout comedies it will inflict on the audience.

And another thing: 72 years will be scarcely more than the distance between us and the start of network television in the U. S., and only one year more than the distance between us and GWTW and The Wizard of Oz.

And 36 minus eight is 28, which is how many years ago Bluto killed himself. Is this immortality really worthy of Mt. Rushmore?

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