Posted 2:46 PM by Gene

Last week in my continuing listing of future movee genius from HSX.com I mentioned "LUKE SPIELBERG'S THREATENED GERSHWIN BIOPIC." This could easily be the worst since Night and Day -- and Jack Warner had an excuse. The world saver starts with three big gaping holes: Al Jolson; Gertrude Lawrence; and the Astaires. (We might add a fourth gaping hole in Oscar Levant.) Who's going to sing all those wonderful songs? Here's a prediction: no one. LUKE will make an entirely DRAMATIC MOVIE. How can He do that? Easily: by devoting the first forty-five minutes to Gershwin's scuffling boyhood and the last forty-five minutes to his brain tumor. (Can you imagine the waves of saccharin from ERICH WOLFGANG KORNGOLD?) We doubt He'll work in his sex life as the family might complain. We suspect Luke will avoid the trap LEGENDARY SCORSESE's set for Himself by avoiding the brand names in his life; hence we have a further hunch He'll cast Seymour Harvey What's-His-Name as Ira. There's a pairing: Spock and Capote. Perhaps He can devote a half-hour to George scribbling notes and Ira typing lyrics -- anything to make up for the lack of true talent to perform those ravishing tunes, unless of course He wants to take a risk and bring in Alanis Morissette and Elvis Costello. At its worst we're talking Ken Russell doing Norman Rockwell. This will be a travesty to end all travesties -- and thus the raves are a foregone conclusion.

P. S. I would note there appears to be nothing on the Web since SUPERNIKKI!!!!!'s breathless ad, so this project might be as much make-believe as on film.