Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Saturday, October 30, 2010

Posted 3:11 PM by Gene

Not long ago the widow of a saint who bequeathed the world untold trillions of mediocre hamburgers for time immemorial and Willard Scott to sell them donated a heavenly $200 million to NPNTR to forever raise the standard of Its superlative broadcasting. Which summons the question: given still another mea culpa from its ombudspoop, what happened to all that money? It should have kept NPNTR in cutting-edge investigative reporting of Republicans until there were no more cows to come home (they having been used up by MICKEY D's). Yet NPNTR and Its affiliates continue to torment their listeners with pledge weeks. Yes, what happened to the burger money, ombudspoop? Spend it all on Big Macs?

Well, to spend whatever's left of it, here's "Music to Gulp Angus Burgers By"!

(Second link via the usual Romy)

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