THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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1. Here is a mystery: Why would BUD charge more to BUD? And why wouldn't INBEV-Anheuser-Busch pay whatever it can to get its executives in the luxury boxes and especially so they could boast to the clerks for three months that I WAS AT THE WORLD SERIES AND YOU WEREN'T!!!!!?
Or maybe even INBEV-Anheuser-Busch can realize that SELIGISM doesn't pull quite the ratings it used to? Yes, is -- a puzzlement.
2. SLIME wants to compete with the KAPLAN, INC. division of KAPLAN, INC.?!? Didn't He already burn money on the new big thing called MySpace?
3. "More than ever, we're focusing on contemporizing and making our iconic brands more relevant to today's consumers," said Dana Anderson, senior VP-marketing strategy and communications.
TRANSLATION: More than ever, Kraft Foods wants to waste Its turnips' wages on JUNK TELEVISION.
4. The bad news: The Republicans will try to underfund the FDA.
The good news: Between that and the GOP's caveat-emptorism it's time for Big Pharma to par-TYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!