THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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ANN, Ann, now that you've hyperventilated you've made it all but inevitable ROCK mu-SICK cri-TICS will get the beloved P-Ulitzers -- they'll probably be the only ones to get them -- but that doesn't make the truth you accidentally uttered any less true: such cri-TICS engage in extraneous, self-indulgent work, making immortals of temporal no-talents, using up more than the God-given supply of adjectives and syllables and pretensions; but PLEASE, Ann, cut the melodrama; in time their extraneous self-indulgence will be RICHLY awarded, as it has elsewhere in the NEWS BIZ.