Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Thursday, May 12, 2011

    Posted 5:09 PM by Gene

    Ever since RONALD REAGAN DESERVED TO DIE or whatever and given its FATHER is the most insufferably glib and snarky pundit of all time we've held GRATE.COM on a short leash. That leash got a little shorter today. Somebody has a very fine and nuanced mind to be able to censor a four-letter word on the home page and allow it in the link. At best it's blazing incompetence; at worst it's abject stupidity.

    As for the ad -- story it reminded me that I take most hacks personally because their intention is personal: to try to force me to think in a way that will IMPROVE THE WORLD, or else to try to sell me five hundred of something so they can impress future bosses -- in short, to engage me in the verbal equivalent of a mugging. Such hacks have vast contempt for their readers, and GRATE.COM has had to employ more than its share, and worse, unleash them elsewhere.

    (Intended for post on date shown; predated due to G000,000,000GLEBLOGGER meltdown)

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