THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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Between him and the Bush=Hitler talk Chevy Chase Syndrome should be at a fever pitch at the Oscars®. And willful ignorance.
Hey Washington Mutual! I'm sure "Middle America" would love having that letch near its daughters! What does your CEO have to say about it? (I can imagine: "I'll be vacationing for a month to attend the Oscars® and therefore no comment!!")
UPDATE: Roman's about to win an Oscar® for Best Performance with a Thirteen-Year-Old Girl, and the actors are about to scream out a four-and-a-half-hour tantrum, and the American Society of Willfully Ignorant Advertisers is worried about offending -- foreign sensibilities!!!!!