THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
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And a few doors away on the home page comes this depressing story, for which a different link: Legs has died. She was beautiful, she could dance, she danced with Fred, she danced to "Dancing in the Dark" with Fred (we have not forgotten the "Broadway Melody" and Gene, let us say that, not at all), she was married to the fine singer named Tony Martin who was as impossibly attractive as she, and now we know we don't have sex symbols in the movies anymore, although that should be obvious to anyone who isn't an ad-blurbist, or an idiot 12-year-old.