Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Friday, December 26, 2008

Posted 1:40 PM by Gene

Speaking of GCI at $7.49, here is one of those inimitable USAOKAY!!!!! automatic typings whose sole purpose it to make the print front page look busy. It is an answer to a question no one but a USAOKAY!!!!! editor would ask, and only under the hot breath of a would be Neuharth: Was 2008 an HISTORIC year? Any hack with tired poor red blood coursing through his veins would say yes as any year's historic with HIM reporting it. That such stories are by definition asinine, that they are the ne plus ultra of asinine, would not occur to the hack trying to justify his job as the industry falls out from under him. So he writes useless stories that shovel ever more spadefuls of dirt from beneath his feet -- and help the former accent on NET!!!!! sell for $7.49.

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