Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

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Sunday, December 19, 2010

Posted 2:33 PM by Gene

Does anybody here remember Ben Wattenberg -- you know, that annoyingly avuncular pundit who used to be on teevee everywhere saying how America was a living breathing embodiment of the holy truths of It's a Wonderful Life? Well, it seems he had a SON, and if HE doesn't gas as much as his DAD did! Look Dan, I don't think "Eleanor Rigby" happy or sad or whatever, and under dreadful circumstances "Happy Birthday" could be a very sad song. Really you ask a question most people would never ask because most people don't need the answer. I'd rather hear the answer to the question, "What makes the Wattenbergs gas?"

(Via the especially irritating Ahts & Letters Daily)

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