THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
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Oops, STEVEDOM AT $50,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No no, I got it -- STEVEDOM AT $5,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hey, who cares when your commissions are at stake?
Double oops -- WRONG LINK!
What's the difference between NEWS HACKS and sales -- ANALYSTS? They both SELL things, and they both MAKE THINGS UP.
P. S. Okay ELMER, that sales -- ANALYST "GUANO" is a TOTAL INCOMPETENT!!!!! But since when has Jeff been turning over His pages to religious cults? Didn't your sister rag once run something on Scientology?