THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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"For two years, we’ve been mercilessly bombarded with the pubescent nonsense of carnival sideshow freaks calling themselves 'The Glee Club'. And now, they’re trying to shove a 3D concert movie down our throats. It’s time to make a stand against these pimply-faced, hormone-ridden twits by joining the 'STOP BELIEVING' campaign. Say 'NO' to their insignificant cinematic experiment. I don’t know about you, but I can’t stand looking at their little satanic faces in 2D, much less 3D."
Thankfully, the teens stopped believing.